*Page 12* *
she saw a bat die in my
compound that i should pray, the next day my
neigbour daughter died, i just sat in bed
confuse dont know what to think, does it
mean that adanna is the snake because she
always hold white something on her wrist in
form of wristwatch, but one thing is quite
clear, anytime i think of her my heart beat
fast, and talking about her lollipop lip, men
that girl is too gbaski, na the type wey i go
carry go party even rihanna go bow, i think i
like her if she like make she be lizard i must
date her oh, because with her respect is
certain.
I was so lost in thought that i dont
know when a test enter my phone. “hi dear,
how is your day going, i want to thank you
for yersterday night, because that night was
the best night ever since nineteen century,
stay safe. From Adanna. Hmmmm infact i dont
think am in the mood to go to school today,
my belle dey sweet me(but in my mind am
still confuse). Waoh i dial the number ” the
number you are trying to call is currently
switch off, please try again later” i hate that
woman, the time is 8am on monday and i
have test around 9 in the morning, but i dont
think the test is important now, adanna is
more important for now, so i stood up,
brush my teeth, worm my afam soup and
took my bath, i ate the afam soup and eba
silently, (i like that soup well well) thinking
about adanna. Number she use to call me
just now how can it be switch off, i redial
again, but still switch off i droped the phone,
as i ate silently a test enter my phone again,
i thought it was adanna, i quickly rush to
read it,
“fuckiing me is one thing and fuccking
my friend is another thing, becareful we are
watching you”. Frm chinansa. Lol abeg make
she go sit down joor, i nor get her time and
she cant do more than a dead rat, wey she
and her sister dey fight for one man, maybe
she think say i nor know, another call enter
my phone from mercy. Me: hello sweetie
mercy: hey dear, i hope you are in school
already, because am almost at the gate. Me:
no oh, am still at home. Mercy: still at home
by this time, or you forgot that we have to
revise before the test. Me: yeah i remember,
just give me 30minutes i will be there. Mercy:
ok i will be in room 101 please be fast.
Me: ok
dear see ya. I told her i will be there before
30minutes, but am i really going? Hmmm
question for the gods, I finish eating, took my
bath, then lie on my bed, wearing just my
boxer and singlet, a call enter my phone
again, this time unknown caller, i pick it. Me:
hello unknown caller: it seems you are not
going to school. Me: adanna.? Adanna: yes.
Me: waoh, your voice sound so sweet.
——————————
*Page 13*
Adanna: hmmm
are you sure. Me: yes of course infact
everything about you is sweet, your voice,
your, lips, your breast, and even your….
Adanna: e don do, by the way, am sorry for
leaving like that i just dont want to disturb
you. Me: no problem, but what happen to the
bulb? Mercy: which bulb? Me: the bulb that
shattered when we were having sex. Adanna:
i think you need to go take panadol, because
you sound weird. Hmmm, maybe i was seeing
things sha, i check my time, 8:40.
Me: ok i
have to go now, i will call you later when i
come back. Adanna: you are not going
anywhere, because there will be no test. Me:
how? What do you mean, hello, hello, hellllooo.
Well maybe her credit don finish, i tried to
call her, but her number switch off, na waoh,
i got dress, spray my Northerner perfume,
comb my hair and set for school, as i was
about to open the door, my phone rang,
caller mercy. Me: i don dey road already i
will be there soon. Mercy: no need am
coming to your house. Me: why, what happen.
Mercy: our lecturer call in sick. I went out to
buy hollandio yoghurt and bread at one
supermarket close to calabar kitchen (if u
know aba well you go know that area) at MCC
road there, i came back remove my clothes
and lie down, i open my hollandio drink and
start drinking, i tried to watch movie from
my laptop but i nor fit, i just cucuma relax
for bed dey reason adanna matter, i dont
know if i should tell mercy because she
worst pass prayer warrior, i remember the
time wey she dey scatter prayer for her
compound, the landlord go knock for her
door telling her shes disturbing the
compound, na so mercy open mouth tell am
say, im nor fit stop am from praying to her
God, the landlord vex slap her twice, chai that
thing vex me well, that night mercy cry come
my house, the next morning i carry police go
arrest the landlord and the yeye police carry
5k for my hand before them gree go arrest
am, well the man pay 10k later for hospital
bill even though i nor carry her go hospital.
Though i know say na mercy dey at fault,
because there is one verse in the bible that
say, dont disturb others when praying, i nor
remember as them quote the verse sha.
I
was lost in my thought when someone open
my door. Mercy: sweetheart how you dey?
Me: i don tell you make you dey knock if you
come my house. She went back and knock and
i said come in. Mercy: are you happy now
me: yeah, ——————————
*Page 14*
mercy: so how are you Me: am fine and
you? Mercy: am alright, this one wey you
just relax so as if person die i hope
everything is alright. Me: am just thinking
about you dear. Mercy: what are thinking
about. Me: about your beauty, after God don
create everybody finish, God come rest for
more 7 days before im create you, na im
make you fine like this na. Mercy: abeg spare
me your sweet sweet mouth, wetin dey pot?
(she said and took my hollandio, she sip it)
Me: no be wetin you cook last. Mercy: why
your room scatter like this na.
Me: i nor
know oh, i dey tire i for arrange. Mercy:
before i met you, your room is always neat
and clean, but now you are always too lazy
to clean your room. Me: na im make God
send you to me na. After she finish my
yoghurt and my bread as if i bought it for
her, she took my dirty plates outside and
wash all of them, she told me to go outside
that she want to clean the room. Me: make i
even stroll go outside self, mercy: stroll go
where. Me: make i reach viewing center
(even if match no dey today) mercy: buy
sunshine when coming back. me: no wahala. I
took 500 naira from my wallet, i went out, on
my way i saw my loving neighbour chinansa
outside washing clothes, she just eye me then
hiss like snake, when i first come to aba, na
she be my first lover, but she come dey claim
activity, like if any girl come my house she go
dey question like frank edoho, the thing come
dey dey too much so i started shunning her,
she no even fine self but she get big ass like
toolzs.
I went out to mcc junction, i cross the
road and enter one bear parlour, they call it
china town, i went in and order for smirnoff,
i was drinking my drink gentlemanly when i
saw her coming down from toyota avalon with
one big man with pot belle, waoh na blessing
be this, oboy i clean my eye well well, i nor
mistake na she, the man old enough to be
her father put hand on her shoulder, they
came inside the bar, she saw me i wave, she
just bone me like one madman, i nor blame
her, later she go dey form virgin for school,.
They look for sit and sat down, the man call
for barman, the barman later came back and
serve them two guider, waoh so she dey
drink self. I continue watching them till test
enter my phone. “you go watch tire today till
you blind” ——————————